dignity

How To Love Your Neighbor When You Disagree.

Our world is full of sin. If it wasn’t apparent before the pandemic, it has become blatantly obvious now. There is so much hurt and suffering going on in our world. Not only that but there is so much anger and hostility towards one another that it feels like everyone is either in some disagreement or fighting about something. I hear and see so many people fighting, both online and offline, about so many things that it breaks my heart. Why cant we agree to disagree like adults? They argue about trivial things and serious things. Such things like young earth creation vs old earth creation, “Christian Nationalism”, getting the vaccine or not, who is a better political candidate or not and so on. Perhaps you’ve witnessed an argument or been a part of one. I know I have. The divide in our world is present and growing.

Not only do people fight and bicker, but I have seen so many people treat each other so poorly for many different reasons. I have seen many people (both Christian and non-Christian) try to force their view onto other people and show a lack of love and kindness because of a different point of view or perspective. Those that disagree and argue with one another cause so much strife and forget to ask the question is this how Jesus would handle the situation? Is this a hill I want to die on? What would Jesus do? How would Jesus love this person? You know what’s more important than winning arguments, bashing each other over the head with our different political beliefs, and superiority / authoritarian complexes? Loving each other no matter what the other person has done, think’s or believes. I think that’s what Jesus would do. I think that’s how to love your neighbor when you disagree. I think if Jesus was walking with us today, he would be flipping some tables and aggressively knocking on some doors regarding how people treat each other with their words and actions. He would scold people and be brutally honest about their own sin and then hug them because he loves them. I think he would be incredibly sad and angry at many of us for the lack of compassion, kindness, and love towards one another.

In Matthew 22: 37-39 Jesus is talking with the Pharisees and if you’re at all familiar with those guys you know they are up to no good. While Jesus is talking to them, one of the Pharisees asks what is the greatest law? Thinking they stumped Jesus, he answers like this, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.”

Love your neighbor as yourself. Those five words carry so much weight and can have generational and world changing impacts. It’s not always easy to love people where they’re at or what they may have done or haven’t done. Maybe they’re a bit prickly or maybe there’s some other reason. It takes time and continual effort to break down walls and to understand people. I think the reason so many people don’t know how to love their neighbor as themselves is because they don’t know what that means. They don’t know where to start. It’s hard to understand what that looks like because we live in broken and fallen world. So many of us want to help each other but we often overstep our boundary and try to make people think, act, and believe in a certain way. Many of us fail to understand that not everyone is the same as us and we can’t force people to think, act or behave in the way we want. We don’t live in a world of clones or robots. This isn’t your favorite sci-fi movie. We live in the real world full of individual people that think, act, and see the world differently than the next person.

To be honest, how do you love someone as yourself that isn’t yourself? I think the answer is by treating people with kindness, dignity, respect and allowing people to have access to their own personal freedoms, agency, and personhood. Allowing people to think and act for themselves and not force a particular lifestyle, belief, or way of thinking on them is essential to living life. I think to truly love others like Christ loved us, we gave let people be people. We need to set aside our differences and meet people in the middle. Sometimes that’s where they’re at in their journey. I think most arguments could be solved with ease if we gave some grace to one another, breathing room and spoke without judging the other person for their personal decisions or sin.

In Matthew 7:1-5 Jesus again hits the nail on the head. He says “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way, you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Aside from the love and hope of Jesus, I think loving someone where they’re at and showing them dignity, respect, compassion, and kindness regardless of their personal decisions is the most powerful thing. As people we can build someone up or destroy them by showing or not showing them love, dignity, respect, and kindness. As people we have to ability to give and take away someone’s personal freedom to choose and decide what is best for themselves. As Christians we can build unity within the body of Christ and cultivate a Christ centered kingdom. That’s huge!! We should be setting aside our differences and perusing a kingdom mindset.   

As Christian’s we shouldn’t be fighting with one another. No, we should be lifting each other up and loving one another. The world is already full of hate for one another, in serious chaos and many non-believers look to Christians as leaders. When they see the great divide between Christians then what good does it accomplish? As the body of Christ, regardless of what the topic is, we should not be fighting with each other and trying to force people to believe or act one way or another. We should not be fighting about trivial things that are going to leave both people with disgust, contempt and hate for one another. Last time I checked hating your brother is a sin. When we fight with people about their choices, whether that’s getting the vaccine then we hurt the relationship that has been built and cause a greater divide among Christian’s and Christian’s among non-Christians. As Christ followers if our goal is to show people who Christ is, then we need to stop bashing each other over the head with our deeply held, often obnoxious and highly personal attitudes, values, and beliefs. There is already enough divide within the Christian world with the many different denominations why do we need to divide each other according to our political beliefs, cultural ideals and so on. Division is not Christ like. Christ did not come to divide but to unite us.

If we are to build unity within the body of Christ and seek to further the kingdom of heaven, then we need to be affording people with the right to choose whatever decision they want without judgment or persecution. No matter the outcome, someone’s choice, whether it’s to get or not get the vaccine, to vote one way or another, or insert other cultural topic (here) is their choice. We need to allow people the freedom and responsibility to choose and make their own decisions but always encourage them to seek Gods will for their life. We as Christians need to stop accusing and condemning people because of their choice and learn to love them as Christ loves them. We as Christians need to be okay with the many different choices our family, friends, and neighbors make and love them and treat them with kindness, dignity, and respect regardless of their choices and then love them unconditionally like Christ loved us.